Move out if the marriage doesn’t serve you anymore

“Move out if the marriage doesn’t serve you anymore”- When I say this to my friends, they are shocked and look at me in disbelief,

but I can tell you that the longer you stay in a marriage that doesn’t work for you or makes you question your sanity,

the more you start hating yourself.

I have been in that marriage, and I can tell you — I was suffering every day.

I had started doubting myself, and I became unreasonable with myself.

At one point, I felt it was all because of me.

Then I would think, ‘These things happen in marriage,’ because the

thought of living alone,

facing the world,

the fear of people looking at me and judging me,

the feeling of being nowhere, and the pressure of managing things overwhelmed me.”

When you decide to leave, it's not easy

Many questions follow later — you question yourself, you feel alone, and you have to figure out a lot of things.

You need to face a lot of challenges, and that discomfort can be overwhelming.

Sometimes, we become so comfortable with the trauma that leaving it becomes just as challenging.

You’ll have the same thoughts running through your mind, and you’ll have to confront them, but this will be very different from the marriage you chose to stay in.

This struggle is different, and it’s worth it.

Osho on Marriage- Marriage Is Really a Dilemma

“I am not against marriage; I simply want you to be aware that there is a possibility of going beyond it too.

But that possibility also open up only because marriage creates so much misery for you, so much anguish and anxiety for you, that you have to learn how to transcend it.

It is a great push for transcendence. Marriage is not unnecessary; it is needed to bring you to your senses, to bring you to your sanity.

Marriage is necessary and yet there comes a point when you have to transcend it too. It is like a ladder.

You go up the ladder, it takes you up, but there comes a moment when you have to leave the ladder behind.

If you go on clinging to the ladder, then there is danger.

“Learn something from marriage. Marriage represents the whole world in a miniature form: it teaches you many things.

It is only the mediocre ones who learn nothing.

Otherwise it will teach you that you don’t know what love is,

that you don’t know how to relate,

that you don’t know how to communicate,

that you don’t know how to commune,

that you don’t know how to live with another.

It is a mirror: it shows your face to you in all its different aspects.

And it is all needed for your maturity.

But a person who remains clinging to it forever remains immature. One has to go beyond it too.

“Marriage basically means that you are not able yet to be alone; you need the other.

Without the other you feel meaningless and with the other you feel miserable.

Marriage is really a dilemma! If you are alone you are miserable; if you are together you are miserable.